2012 - A Survival Guide for The Rest of Us

Survival tips for the coming apocalypse:

• Drink plenty of water.
• Don't eat potato salad at picnics unless you brought it and can absolutely vouch for the chain of refrigeration.
• Stay the hell out of the way of all the morons and nutbags that will be running around at the last minute preparing for something that isn't even a real thing.

Seriously, if I have to listen to one more "end of the world blah blah blah" rant from someone who has no clue what the whole Mayan calendar rollover thing is about, I'm going to start carrying water balloons and anyone who opens their yap on this topic will get soaked. Just because we get to the end of their calendar, the whole world goes KA-BLOOIE? Then why doesn't anything happen when I reach the end of my Far Side calendar, or my Dilbert calendar,  or my Bob Marley calendar, or my Suicide Girls calendar, or my... you get the point. You just buy a new calendar and the whole thing starts over again, with a different number on the front... it's not even like Y2K,  where there was a real issue underneath all the hysteria. I, like many in those days, put in a lot of work to make sure that when the ball dropped on 01 Jan 2000, nothing happened. This 2012 thing, however, is simply a colossal mind-fuck - a practical joke on a massive time scale, the kind of thing that happens when you react to things without actually bothering to find out the back story. It's really made worse by the fact that we can spread rumors and memes at close to the speed of light, via the Internet... and if it's on the 'Net, it must be true, right?

If you are so inclined, you can read more about the Mayan Calendar on Wikipedia, here. It's really quite interesting enough in and of itself, without having to try to spice things up with New Age pseudo-mystical bullshit. 

Just sayin'.